dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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