your parents love me but you hate me
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize