I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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