I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize