dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
