belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
