That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize