Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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