I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
So much rum. So many feels.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
