So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
