party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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