She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
