She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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