Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
