Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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