i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
The struggles of a small town man whore
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
