I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i think i scared a bird with my dick
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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