What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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