Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
