you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
