a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
