Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
