This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
