can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
