called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I think your dad took our porno
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
