I wish I could teleport
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
