Kiss
Puke
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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