Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
