I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize