Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize