was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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