those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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