do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
