she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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