shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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