You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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