Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
