They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
