Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize