evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
