did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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