Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
my mouth tastes like poor choices
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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