why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
