haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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