No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Randomize