Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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