I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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