Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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