You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
