Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
